How to Course Correct Your Life with Teacher Korinne Kornmann
Hear how Korinne Kornmann's role in her family system as the "smart one" influenced her exhausting and endless drive to achieve, all the way to the wrong school and career. She shares her feelings of failure as she moved home one semester into college and how she continued to seek validation and avoid "making another mistake" by choosing a new, impressive school and well-paying career after graduation. Shortly into this career, Korinne had a moment of clarity that set her on the path to education where she now feels energized, inspired, fulfilled and aligned. I relate so deeply to Korinne and her story, so I'm sure many of you do too. Part of growing up is seeking love and validation in all the wrong ways; The choices we make in that pursuit are not mistakes, they are important lessons and all a part of the plan. This episode is perfect for anyone who feels "off" in their life and career but continues to question their ideas of what might feel right.
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Transcript:
00;00;07;04 - 00;00;31;07
Steph
I'm Stephanie Hammond and this is the Fruition podcast. On this show, I sit down with passionate people who've brought their dreams to fruition. We'll explore different versions of success and fulfillment and dig in to what was on their mind along the way. With these conversations, I hope we can all expand our sense of possibility. And who knows? Maybe hearing their stories will inspire you to take action on yours.
00;00;31;09 - 00;00;59;07
Steph
Hello, everybody. Happy Wednesday. You're halfway through the week. Hopefully these episodes are fun for you to listen to midweek. My goal is that they're entertaining and hopeful and just a good time to listen to, but also inspiring and informative. So my logic is that if you're listening to them midweek, you still have a few days to put what you learned into action.
00;00;59;10 - 00;01;21;29
Steph
Or if you're like me, you're a few days to the weekend where maybe you want to take some time to reflect on what you heard. So anyways, I love Wednesdays and basically consider them the end of the week. So I'm happy to be here with you. We're in the second half today. We're talking to Karen Kaufman, who's a fourth grade teacher in Irvine, California.
00;01;22;01 - 00;01;50;10
Steph
It feels like we're kindred spirits, I guess, because we both really committed to the achiever schtick through our childhood, our teen years, twenties, and I mean, hell, even now, in both of our families, we had siblings with incredible talents and for whatever reason we picked up that we were supposed to be the smart ones. So we made choices that reinforce that label of smart, quote unquote.
00;01;50;12 - 00;02;18;21
Steph
Watch. As you'll hear, we didn't even really feel that we were smart. So this really fueled Karen to reject the idea of teaching, even though pretty early on she thought it could be a career that would be a great fit for her. Obviously, she found her way back to her aligned path, but not without some diversions along the way, which she very candidly shares in our conversation.
00;02;18;24 - 00;02;48;07
Steph
I resonate so deeply with her experience and honestly, these familial labels aren't something I think I've ever talked about openly. So I'm curious, what about you guys? What was your label amongst your siblings, if you had any siblings? Did you try to fulfill it throughout your life? I'd be curious to know, so let me know. On Instagram. I changed my handle to at the Fruition podcast, so hopefully that's easy.
00;02;48;14 - 00;03;11;20
Steph
Hit me up there. This is a fun one to talk about. It's really interesting. Okay. My current obsession right now that's helping me to stay focused and prioritize the things that are most important to me is the habit app I posted in my stories. And if you're listening later, it'll be in my obsessions highlight on Instagram. It's basically a daily to do list with your recurring habits.
00;03;11;20 - 00;03;36;26
Steph
So I have in there all the things that I strive to complete in a day to make sure I'm taking care of myself. It's mostly my morning routine with a few afternoon things. So for example, on my daily list in the morning I have on their sun in my eyes meditation, wash my face, brush my teeth, drink a hydro flask of water with minerals, dry brush, move my body and jump in the water.
00;03;37;01 - 00;04;07;13
Steph
Obviously I don't do it every day, but that's what I'm striving for. I have an item on there that shows me my daily steps. Another item is to update my monthly budget so that one pops up monthly on a specific day I have in there to water my plants once a week. You've plant food every two weeks. Basically, it helps me keep track of the stuff that I wouldn't put on my actual to do list or like write in a calendar or create a calendar invite, but is still very important to me and it resets every day.
00;04;07;14 - 00;04;30;00
Steph
So if I'm feeling super distracted or behind or pulled in a bunch of different directions, I can check the app really quick and it's kind of like it centers me very quickly so I can see what my focus should be because I know that these are high priority items that keep me healthy and happy, and then I can plan the rest of my day around those things.
00;04;30;02 - 00;04;54;26
Steph
I've been thinking about focus a lot lately. Is this an issue for you guys? It's definitely an issue for me. I struggle with it big time, so I'm kind of putting together some tools and systems for myself to figure it out. But I'm curious what has helped you? Please share and be? What do you think your biggest issue with Focus is like?
00;04;54;26 - 00;05;20;29
Steph
Do you have too many things on your mind? Are there too many competing high priority items? Do you just not have a good system like me? Let me know. Hopefully we can talk about it more. I think that you all are probably really smart and maybe someone has a tip, so let's share it. Anyways, enjoy today's episode. Have a great week and weekend and I'll see you soon.
00;05;21;02 - 00;05;29;08
Steph
Where in Orange County are you from? And did you have you left at any point or have you stayed there and lived in Orange County since you were born?
00;05;29;11 - 00;05;51;24
Korinne
Yeah. So I was born in Newport Beach and then lived there up until my junior year of high school. So pretty like Newport Beach centered existence. And then my parents bought a home in San Clemente when I was a junior. So actually to be knew my junior year of high school, which was it was a really weird experience too, because like, it wasn't like we moved to like Nevada or like, or again, like, you know, just somewhere like a new state.
00;05;52;00 - 00;06;09;15
Korinne
And I had my driver's license. And so it was this like, weird kind of like I had one foot left, you know, back in New York. But I did have a brief stint at Penn State, which was I lasted six months and for like a million reasons. I ended up not wanting to go or like not wanting to stay there.
00;06;09;15 - 00;06;24;04
Korinne
And so I was at USC and then got a job at Oracle from USC. And so I have lived basically in Southern California, Northern California and then Pennsylvania for like six months. I don't even know if that counts.
00;06;24;11 - 00;06;29;19
Steph
I think it counts. Yeah. Why? Why did you go to Spain? Yeah.
00;06;29;21 - 00;06;49;26
Korinne
Oh, yeah. So in high school, I like just the biggest overachiever that you could think of. Like I did not party. I think I, like, made eye contact with, like, one boy one time, Like, I was just not, like, I would say nerdy, but it's like I had friends, I had a social life, but I think I was just, like, pretty rigid and very like, I'm going to get good grades and I want to go to school.
00;06;49;27 - 00;07;06;20
Korinne
I think like a good college, really all like it was all consuming. I did play volleyball, so it was like and I did clubs and stuff. So like, I don't want to paint myself as like a hermit, but it was just very like one track minded and I really just want to go to UCLA. And I applied to so many schools.
00;07;06;20 - 00;07;32;15
Korinne
I think it was like 11, and I got into every single school that I do except for UCLA. So I, I call it like an 18 year old tantrum. Like I was I was like not I was just unwell, like and it was so funny because my mom was trying to say, like and I got into other like, you see, like Cal State schools, like schools that were also good schools just basically was not you couldn't talk to me and you couldn't reason with me.
00;07;32;15 - 00;07;51;09
Korinne
Like, I was just like, that was kind of my first, I think like big devastation of like, wow, I did all that. I worked that hard and I didn't get to go somewhere. I want to go like, this sucks. And so I ended up talking so random. Like, apparently I listened to a girl I barely knew. It was like my little sisters friend's older sister hyped up Penn State.
00;07;51;09 - 00;08;11;14
Korinne
And so it was one of the ones that I had applied to. That was the father. So I in my in my delusion and just my like unwell ness, I was like, I'm going to go away. Like, yeah, I'm not going to go to UCI, I'm not going to go to DSU or like UCSB, like I'm not going to go to any of these reasonable schools that like I would also equally like an our equally as impressive.
00;08;11;19 - 00;08;34;22
Korinne
I'm going to make my parents pay an out-of-state tuition to send me to a state college in Pennsylvania where it's negative degrees or I don't know a single person. And that's the best choice. And it was interesting because I remember my mom like is just a really supportive person. And so she didn't want to tell me no. But she also, like, gave reasons as to why, like all of these really clear, rational adult thoughts.
00;08;34;22 - 00;08;53;28
Korinne
And I was just like, no, I'm I'm going to go there. And it it ended as you would think, like I had I had I didn't party right. So I didn't drink and I was plopped into Amish country, Pennsylvania, where it's like one of the major party schools. And I'm just like, trying to be like a cool 18 year old.
00;08;53;28 - 00;08;57;17
Korinne
That's like, never had a sip of alcohol. And like said.
00;08;57;19 - 00;09;24;10
Steph
I totally relate to that feeling of overachieving in high school. And like, you don't even give yourself the opportunity to question what you're doing, because at least in the environment that I was in and my interpretation of it, it felt like there was no other option. Like you have to do absolute best. You have to exceed in as many areas as possible, because the only thing that's important is getting into the best college that you can get to.
00;09;24;12 - 00;09;45;26
Steph
Yeah, to be elite like nuthin but elite and anything less than that, you have to have an excuse for it or something along those lines. And it's funny because it's all ego. I mean, like obviously education is valuable, but you can get a great education in many different places and like obviously network is valuable, but you can also build an incredible network in many different places.
00;09;46;01 - 00;10;08;14
Steph
Those are things to consider, but 90% of it is ego. And I realized that when I ended up going to Colorado because I visited, I visited the different schools that I got into and I like spent a weekend at each of them. If I had a friend that went there and all of them felt wrong, it was just like a feeling or there was something that stood out like, Ooh, I don't think I'm going to do well here.
00;10;08;14 - 00;10;24;14
Steph
Like, this may seem like my environment. And then when I was just walking on the campus at C you in Boulder where Kelly and I went, I was like, This is it. This is I actually I did this test where I would walk around the campus and I would smile at people and I would see if they would smile back at me.
00;10;24;17 - 00;10;29;07
Korinne
And I'm like, How did you think of that in such a young age?
00;10;29;10 - 00;10;54;02
Steph
I don't know. I just was like, let me I mean, to connect with people. And I think that I went into my first tour and like, thought that I would connect with people and didn't. And so then I started like noticing that that might not be a given everywhere I went. And so one of the schools that I too worried that I thought I was certain about, I did that test in like no one looked at me.
00;10;54;02 - 00;11;08;14
Steph
I was like completely invisible on campus. And I was like, Wow. I thought that this was my number one school. But I feel like shocked, like, I don't know, I would hear this feels bad. A lot of people are like comparing academic programs. I want to have a good year doing a vibe check.
00;11;08;14 - 00;11;09;05
Korinne
Yeah.
00;11;09;07 - 00;11;10;00
Steph
You know, vibe check.
00;11;10;01 - 00;11;30;17
Korinne
I had to realize crazy at my mom when she we we, I committed to Penn State prior to going through it. That's how delusional. Oh, wow. When the first time that we went there, my mom and I were sitting at a Panera and I started falling. Oh, this was prior to going there. And my mom was like, You can back out and go to a junior.
00;11;30;17 - 00;11;34;05
Korinne
Like, you can go to Saddleback. You do not need to go here.
00;11;34;06 - 00;11;41;13
Steph
There's so much ego go which anyone listening if you're going to college or if you're taking a job or if you're dating someone and you have that feeling.
00;11;41;16 - 00;11;55;09
Korinne
That's like you just walk away. Well, it's all like, No, doctor, Penn State. Like, I feel like I like I've met people there that like that was their their whole. But I think it really was the partying aspect of it. Like, yeah, now I know how to good have a good time and I did not Yeah.
00;11;55;09 - 00;12;16;23
Steph
And I mean to be totally transparent the school that I toured where no one smiled at me was USC where you had a great experience. And I know many, many, many people who have had wonderful experiences there, but it just like it wasn't for me, you know, and all it from that. Okay. And thank you. But looking back on how everything played out, I was in the exact right place for me and it was exactly what it supposed to be.
00;12;16;25 - 00;12;38;17
Steph
But you just get so clouded by like that environment that you're raised in. Do you think that for you it was your community, like your broader community, or was it more so your family before? When we talked, we talked a little bit about siblings and just, you know, the labels that are assigned to us by parents or by friends and and how you start to associate with that identity.
00;12;38;17 - 00;12;40;28
Steph
And then you don't really question it.
00;12;41;01 - 00;13;01;25
Korinne
I have an older sister and she was, I would say, like an average student, but she was on the dance team and had we've grown up like she was the dad. And my younger sister is just like my social butterfly. She went social. She was doing the thing with all the friends my older sister had dance and so like, I just really they their messaging was like, we never have to worry about you in school.
00;13;01;25 - 00;13;18;00
Korinne
And so I think I really took that and was like, Oh, my parents value that I'm smart. I think I just made that my thing because I was like that you're telling me that's my thing. That's the thing. And getting all the praise and the positive feedback for so like, let's just dive in and really.
00;13;18;00 - 00;13;41;19
Steph
That's so funny. I thought a lot about that because my family's similar. I think every family labels, if there's multiple kids, like everyone gets their category, you know, and I my siblings also were like, my parents were on top of my brother for sure. He just has so many other interests. And so they were on top of him to focus academically because that was not what he wanted to do.
00;13;41;19 - 00;13;51;17
Steph
And I, I took that role on also as, okay, I'll, I'll be self-motivated. I'll take care of myself so that you don't have to worry about me. I'll I'll get that done.
00;13;51;17 - 00;13;54;23
Korinne
Yeah. Like I'm good. You can worry about him. Yeah, but then.
00;13;54;25 - 00;14;15;05
Steph
The way that I found I could get attention was by overachieving in everything. And so, like, if I'm not going to get attention to get my shit done, then I'm going to get my attention. This other way by pushing myself beyond my balance. And what I've come to realize in the last couple of years is like, I don't want to be the academic one.
00;14;15;05 - 00;14;35;20
Steph
I don't want to be this really like I put so much emphasis on the academic side that I really, like stunted my creative growth and like spiritual growth or whatever else I might have. Maybe what else might have balanced me more when I was younger, you know? And it's just so funny how that can drive you for such a long time.
00;14;35;20 - 00;15;03;28
Steph
And now I'm 31 years old. I'm like, If you've got a couple of years, I've been rediscovering that and like allowing myself to act like a kid in those areas and learning to regrow that side and, and, you know, reshape my life based on that. But those labels when you're a kid, are I think that they're good. They obviously push you to become, you know, a successful person in that category, most likely, but they can be so limiting.
00;15;04;00 - 00;15;09;19
Steph
What did you think you wanted to do when you were a kid and you were like excited to be given that label?
00;15;09;22 - 00;15;14;01
Korinne
And I thought it was lawyer, which I think is like it's always like doctor lawyer. And I think I just like when it was.
00;15;14;01 - 00;15;16;29
Steph
The time of Legally Blond. I think we all wanted to do that.
00;15;16;29 - 00;15;25;03
Korinne
Yeah. And it's so random and I, it's weird saying it out loud, but like, my family was obsessed with Law and Order SVU, which like, I'd, I'd.
00;15;25;03 - 00;15;26;03
Steph
Yeah, I.
00;15;26;03 - 00;15;27;02
Korinne
Like, know the intro.
00;15;27;02 - 00;15;28;10
Steph
I can't say any more than.
00;15;28;12 - 00;15;30;17
Korinne
You know it's really it's just.
00;15;30;17 - 00;15;31;16
Steph
Disturbing.
00;15;31;20 - 00;15;49;03
Korinne
Disturbing and like that's what I think is the funniest thing. Like my family. No joke, would sit around the couch and watch Law and Order SVU together and and Law and Order. But I don't know if like, I just, like, didn't realize like that that should be kind of awkward to watch with your mom, you know, or like, I don't even know, like, my sisters.
00;15;49;03 - 00;16;01;27
Korinne
But we, like, we loved it. And so I think because it just seems like really serious and a career that people were like, Oh, you're a lawyer. Like, that's that's really cool. Like, you must be really smart because you made it like boy or doctor.
00;16;01;29 - 00;16;18;27
Steph
Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Interesting. Okay, so if you were to kind of define your idea of success, it would probably be something that was a high paying, difficult job that not everyone could do. That was probably like a little bit too gaudy and people were impressed by.
00;16;19;00 - 00;16;32;16
Korinne
And I would just say like, yeah, like people had to be like one. You made a lot of money. You're like doing well. And also like, oh, like you must be smart. I think that that was like the box I was trying to check. Like, whatever you do, it had to be a job that someone was like, Oh, wow, you're doing not.
00;16;32;16 - 00;16;36;01
Korinne
You must be really smart, right? So that was all I that was all I wanted, Right?
00;16;36;02 - 00;16;37;14
Steph
Right. Validate the label.
00;16;37;20 - 00;16;42;16
Korinne
Yeah, Validate that. I'm smart. So, like, you give me a job where I have to be smart.
00;16;42;18 - 00;16;49;09
Steph
What's funny is so. Did you feel smart? Like, did you feel like you were the smart one?
00;16;49;12 - 00;17;10;03
Korinne
No. And that's what's funny. And I at one time I made a comment. I get like TMI, like in a therapy session. I was like, sometimes I feel like I spent a lot of time, like, trying to seem smart. Yeah, that like, yeah, that like. And I don't actually, like, feel smarter. And they were like, no, like in order to, like, like you can't speak, like, doing well like that was, that was the comment back.
00;17;10;03 - 00;17;28;00
Korinne
They were like, if you were getting the good grades like you were studying. And I think but I do think that that circles back to like sometimes like natural, like you're in natural intelligence versus like what you have to work towards. I think I just that's really what I think maybe made me not feel smart. It just made me feel like a hard worker.
00;17;28;00 - 00;17;42;05
Korinne
Was that like I was constantly doing our everyth anything I could do to, like, achieve and take on. But like, it wasn't easy. And so I think because I thought it wasn't easy, I wasn't smart.
00;17;42;07 - 00;18;05;17
Steph
Yes. Oh, my gosh. Okay. I really do that so much. I thought that I was pulling one over on everybody until, like, I was like when I, you know, literally and then I took this test for a year that was like to me in my mind, there was such a huge piece of me that was like, this is my final test that if I can pass this, I, this is my stamp of approval.
00;18;05;17 - 00;18;16;11
Steph
Like I can officially say that, that this was a hard thing to do and that I'm smart. And even when I finished it, I was like, I just studied really hard. I just tried really hard. Like, it doesn't look smart.
00;18;16;11 - 00;18;27;05
Korinne
I just said, That means you're smart. Like you can take in information. Even when I got my master's, I was like, Well, that was easy. But like, it was it was just an easy program. Like, no, it right, right.
00;18;27;08 - 00;18;47;00
Steph
Right, exactly. But it's such a mind fuck. And then, like, in my own case, I want to speak for you, but I spent so much time and energy trying to prove that and get the validation like I was seeking more important, quote unquote, impressive quote unquote, jobs to validate that to myself or to have others validate that back to me.
00;18;47;00 - 00;19;01;12
Steph
I wanted someone else to say like, okay, yeah, like you passed the test, you checked the box. Like you can officially identify with that smart that people have placed on you, that you think you've been fooling everyone for your entire.
00;19;01;14 - 00;19;05;22
Korinne
Oh, it's a it's a cheap mind. I know.
00;19;05;24 - 00;19;07;20
Steph
Just so everyone knows.
00;19;07;22 - 00;19;12;12
Korinne
Yeah. You. Yeah. You're smart. The moral of that story.
00;19;12;14 - 00;19;16;12
Steph
I guess that's why I got really high. Or maybe more.
00;19;16;14 - 00;19;18;25
Korinne
Yeah, right. Hard worker.
00;19;18;28 - 00;19;31;14
Steph
I know, I know, but it's just. I think that labels are so funny, and I think it's so funny how long you can carry them with you. I think they're good. I think they're bad. I think they drive you and motivate you and I think they hold you back and are limiting like, it's just it's such an interesting thing.
00;19;31;14 - 00;19;40;07
Steph
And there's no one takeaway because like, it plays a role in different aspects of your life in the positive and in the negative. It just not to as.
00;19;40;10 - 00;20;02;02
Korinne
I was, I was gonna say one time I told a therapist that I thought I had social anxiety and she was like, and it was new. She kind of like smirked and was just like, Where did you get that from? And I was like, I don't know, because like some of the nervous talking to people, but like, I mean, I think when it's to the root of it, I'm just always I mean, I think I'm growing and doing better, but I'm constantly concerned about like what someone's perception of me is.
00;20;02;02 - 00;20;20;24
Korinne
And I think it was crippling back then. And so, like, I think I thought I had like I couldn't talk to people, but I'm like when I look like I'm like, I can I have friends, Like I can talk to them and like I like talking to people. And I think social anxiety is like truly like being anxious, like forming friendships and forming connections and like having conversations.
00;20;20;24 - 00;20;22;23
Korinne
And that like, gives me life like, right?
00;20;22;29 - 00;20;24;01
Steph
That is not about.
00;20;24;07 - 00;20;34;16
Korinne
Anything all the time. And I feel a pretty open vocation. So it's like it's funny that even like those types of things, I'm like, like, I just think I always put myself in a box of labels.
00;20;34;18 - 00;20;56;28
Steph
So yeah. And I found that social anxiety, too, because I thought that I. Question Yeah, one point were very simple Are we, are we ready? I think so. But I question that at one point. And then I realized, like I'm putting up a front, I'm working, I'm doing overtime in this interaction with someone trying to portray a certain image of myself.
00;20;57;04 - 00;21;06;10
Steph
So no wonder I'm stressed out because I'm like trying to like, manipulate them into perceiving me in some way. Like, that's hard work. I'm tired. It's hard.
00;21;06;11 - 00;21;07;06
Korinne
You're tired? Yeah.
00;21;07;12 - 00;21;33;28
Steph
It's like hard to keep up with the story and like, you're thinking about what you're saying before you actually say it. And the more a I think that, the more I let go of trying to be someone that I'm not obviously. And then and then surrounding myself with people who feel good about not playing some sort of role, you know, and then all of that dissipates as soon as you're willing to let go of that role and just show up and be like you, they like you.
00;21;33;28 - 00;21;54;23
Steph
If they don't, they don't. And I do come across people that I still feel uncomfortable with. And I Oh, yeah, you know, if you're not good enough around or whatever it is, but at least now I know maybe there's something else there and that's not a me thing. All the time. I'm willing to look at it, but like, now I know I'm showing up as me, and if I'm still not feeling good, we just might not jive.
00;21;54;23 - 00;21;55;17
Steph
And that.
00;21;55;20 - 00;21;56;29
Korinne
Yeah, yeah, that's.
00;21;56;29 - 00;21;58;20
Steph
That's just the way it is with people.
00;21;58;20 - 00;22;18;05
Korinne
Like, I think too. Like it seems like we have somewhere where like, I think the best thing that ever happened to me was like learning that like, not everyone has to like you and there, there could be no reason. Like, there was like, I think someone, it was like the 8020 rule where it's like 80% of people will like you and like, understand who you are and 20% for no reason and no fault of your own will just find you annoying.
00;22;18;11 - 00;22;27;19
Korinne
And that was like the most like, okay, cool. So like out of my control, 20% of the people I interact with just I'm not for them. And I should be fine with that.
00;22;27;19 - 00;22;49;06
Steph
Okay, so let's go back to USC really quick. Yeah. Love our tangents by the way. More, please. So you transferred from Penn State to USC and it hadn't been on your radar before, but it sounds like in retrospect you're pretty happy that you ended up going to USC and you were interested in PR, but not really exactly sure what you wanted to do at this point.
00;22;49;08 - 00;23;02;00
Steph
I think the Law and Order SVU, criminal justice shouldn't have sailed, and you learn a little about yourself. So what were you thinking? You would study and you would maybe come out of school doing?
00;23;02;02 - 00;23;22;00
Korinne
I couldn't go my freshman year. I had to do one. I had to do a semester, my junior college, which was like soul crushing, like I moved out. I got home, I moved back, and then I was just ferociously like, How do I get out of here? And it's so funny because you hit on people's dream school and a school that a lot of people would die to go to.
00;23;22;01 - 00;23;51;17
Korinne
And I say in like kind of once, like, embarrassed way that like I wanted to go there because I thought it would going to get me out faster. And just like I think there was still that this is a school I can transfer to that has like some prestige, which because I'm still in that box. And so, like, I made a really, really bad mistake and I'm so miserable and I'm so sad that like at nine 1819, I already feel like a failure that like I need to get myself somewhere where people like, think is is good again.
00;23;51;17 - 00;24;14;20
Korinne
And so that was kind of the main motivation for going there. And but then I just stuck with PR because I think in my head it was like I've already taken like 18 lectures, but you know, like I've taken so many pivots, like I can now go to a new school and have a new interest. And I really didn't even know there's a lot of pressure, I think, on, you know, kids that are teenagers to just be like, what do you want to do?
00;24;14;20 - 00;24;36;09
Korinne
And like, it has to be something that you're like eating, sleeping, breathing, driving in. And so I loved learning about PR, but I just like I did a lot of internships. I interned at Soho House, I interned at this place called Jen are like, I did fun things, but I just think like, I didn't really. I still at that point, like it was more just kind of like, this is a cool story.
00;24;36;09 - 00;24;57;18
Korinne
Like, Oh, I'm at these places, I'm doing these things. But like, I didn't really, like, be awfully fulfilled and I don't even think I knew what that meant. It just felt really cool and like a really positive thing to be a part of. And I think thinking back to that, like hard working part, like I thrived there, like I made friends, like I really enjoyed being there and doing what I was doing.
00;24;57;18 - 00;25;13;24
Korinne
But I think I am just someone that like, no matter what environment I'm put in, I refuse to be bad at it. It was not checking any boxes for me, but I was just like, Wow, I'm going to be the best at whatever I'm doing. So like, this is it. This is what I'm doing. So yeah, that was kind of where where I was at.
00;25;13;25 - 00;25;34;05
Korinne
And so randomly, Oracle happened, which my first job out of college, I was at like a career fair at USC and it was my senior year and I was just like, This sucks. Like, I don't know what I'm doing and I don't know like where I want to be. And I was just talking to anything that sounded cool, exciting, successful, interesting.
00;25;34;05 - 00;25;54;22
Korinne
So it was this crossover where like the job was selling like social media related software. And so it was kind of like a consulting, but like it also was like sales. But I just, I ended up interviewing and like, that was what I got and I just didn't really have any other options. And of course, being the person that I was was never going to move home and like figure it out, right?
00;25;54;22 - 00;26;12;03
Korinne
I think that and I think I carried a lot of like shame or just embarrassment of like I'm we can't make another failure. Like, I already chose the wrong college. I my mom was nice enough to like, help me pivot and support me through that. But like, I can't I can't be disappointing again because I already was disappointing.
00;26;12;05 - 00;26;24;25
Korinne
I have to now do something that's bigger and like I have, this has to have amounted to something. And so that's kind of where I was at when I moved up there because it was just this I have to do. I have just like good, you know, Yeah.
00;26;25;00 - 00;26;33;23
Steph
Like you said, plop you down in any environment, you're going to be the best you possibly can be. So. Right. Were you doing pretty well at Oracle? Like, how are things going?
00;26;33;26 - 00;26;50;14
Korinne
They put us in a role that essentially, like you used to have to have like five years of experience. So there was like a huge learning curve where we were all kind of just like figuring it out together. But like I learned how to like cold call, I learned how to like, do all the things like make the presentations.
00;26;50;14 - 00;27;07;14
Korinne
And as usual, I really went like full force into it. And then I if you do any legwork, you get attached to deals. So I ended up working on a deal that was like the biggest deal that they had had. I think it was like Q3 or something. Like not only like I was winning a war, I won an award.
00;27;07;14 - 00;27;24;04
Korinne
Like I didn't just like go there and like it was kind of like I got and it was like money I had never seen in my life. Like I had like a job as a hostess, like, you know, like ten hour, $10 an hour here and there. But I think I got like that deal specifically. I think it was like 1012 commission.
00;27;24;08 - 00;27;44;20
Korinne
And I was just like, Oh my God. Like what? What is this? Like people make money doing the things like this, Like and I don't know, it was it was really trippy because again, like, wasn't passionate about it was really just like but I think I was just so used to overworking and like, not even knowing if I'm enjoying it, but putting everything I had into it.
00;27;44;20 - 00;28;03;06
Korinne
And then, of course, the dangling carrot. Well, cool. You got an award or cool you made money. So therefore you have to be happy. Because what else? What else is there in terms of success? You got put in an environment that you should like because it's it's impressive and it sounds cool. And not only did you do that, but you did it well.
00;28;03;09 - 00;28;20;24
Korinne
So like what You really can't have anything to complain about. And I think I'm someone like that internalizes a lot. And so it was just like, I want that. It took me like such a long time to even realize how miserable I was in that because I was just I'm not allowed to be miserable. Right? It's like, right.
00;28;20;28 - 00;28;24;09
Korinne
There's. Yeah. What you can't what is there to complain about?
00;28;24;09 - 00;28;36;28
Steph
Right. Right. So how did that feeling of misery show up for you? Like, what did you start noticing about yourself and your life? And then, and then what was your come to Jesus.
00;28;37;01 - 00;29;05;22
Korinne
Being really like, apathetic, having thoughts of like, if I don't show up to this job tomorrow, someone will come in my place and the same things will happen. It was this like weird reflection of purpose of like, I, I what I'm doing doesn't matter. It it really does it. And I don't care that this pharmaceutical company now has the ability to listen to what people are saying about them on Twitter because I don't care.
00;29;05;22 - 00;29;25;02
Korinne
I'm like, I guess maybe that just makes them more money. But like, what am I doing as a whole for myself, for society? Like like when I die, like, will people be like, well, she thought a lot of social relationship management thought, you know, like it was I was having those moments, but I wasn't really like talking about it to anyone.
00;29;25;02 - 00;29;44;02
Korinne
And I wasn't really, like, expressing that. But then it was like, What do you even want to do? And it wasn't like immediate the teaching thing, which is so interesting because I always have loved that type of role. I did a lot of stuff when I was younger, working with children, like being like volleyball coaches, like church camp type things.
00;29;44;02 - 00;29;59;07
Korinne
Like it just I did a lot that where it put me in leadership role. But I my mom actually paid for me. Well, I was working at Oracle. I took because I was like, maybe I could be a real estate agent. And in my head I'm like, purpose, like giving family homes. Like, that's still a job.
00;29;59;10 - 00;30;00;15
Steph
Selling to your house.
00;30;00;18 - 00;30;15;11
Korinne
My mom paid for it because she's just such a homey. She was just like, Whatever will make you happy. Like, I'm going to support you and help you. Like, you just got to tell me. I did mention to her it's like being teacher and her first reaction, which is so funny. I was like, Well, I think you'd be really good at that.
00;30;15;11 - 00;30;38;22
Korinne
Well, what is it like? What does that look like? Because I had never like, I thought about being a teacher and I had expressed it, but it got quashed really quickly because a lot of the conversation about it was like, Well, you're smarter than that. Like, and it's so it makes me so angry because I felt to still to this day, people act like if you teach kindergarten, you only have to be like as smart as a kindergarten or like if you teach first grade and then like, high first grade is actually the hardest grade in the entire world.
00;30;38;22 - 00;30;57;24
Korinne
You're teaching kids how to read. You have to be so educated to understand and like, define where a kid is, maybe needs more intervention and like, reinforcement. So just it does make me mad because I think it was deep down in there, but it was kind of just, Oh, you're better than that. And I think, of course, I was like, Yeah, I am better than that.
00;30;57;24 - 00;30;59;12
Korinne
So like, I'm not doing that well.
00;30;59;12 - 00;31;06;19
Steph
And what's interesting about when people say You're better than that, I think what they're meaning to say is you can make more than you.
00;31;06;19 - 00;31;07;18
Korinne
Would make money.
00;31;07;19 - 00;31;28;13
Steph
Yeah, money. You can make more money than you would maybe more effective on something else. Yes, with less work probably too. I mean, teaching art is hell, you know, It's like you can make a lot more money doing something else because we are used to defining success or we're used to be an incentivized by money. But not everyone is money motivated.
00;31;28;16 - 00;31;45;24
Korinne
So that was just I was really discouraged when it was more school. But what's so crazy that I do feel like full circle is I was pretty frugal with the money I was making commissioned wise from Oracle, and I ended up not going into any more debt because I paid with my commission from Oracle. I paid for my credential program.
00;31;45;24 - 00;31;47;09
Korinne
So it was not.
00;31;47;12 - 00;31;48;25
Steph
A full circle moment.
00;31;48;27 - 00;32;05;23
Korinne
It was kind of cool in that way. But then so I went home and I was so just like, okay, I got to do something. And so I kind of leverage the USC network and I got a job pretty quickly at a restaurant and hospitality PR company because in my head I was like, What if I was wrong?
00;32;05;23 - 00;32;25;20
Korinne
Like, what if it's just not the right environment and I didn't make a mistake? I just need to be if I'm home. That day, I even started backtracking. I had traction to make this life change. And then the gravity of how big a life change it was started dropping me. And so I that I did. I think it was like three months I worked.
00;32;25;20 - 00;32;46;16
Korinne
It was part time. I commuted from San Clemente to L.A., which was insane to work at this company. And they hired me on part time. And then I was doing really well and they offered me a full time job. And it was so funny because like, well, I was at this job, I was Googling like, what? What? Like, you know, score you need on this to get into this program for teaching.
00;32;46;16 - 00;33;04;20
Korinne
And so it was like even at that point, I think I just wanted to like if anyone asks, like, oh, I'm not at home. I'm like, I'm figuring it out. I'm going to move to L.A. I just needed some sort of cover story to like, feel like I was doing something instead of give myself any sort of time, breath, moment to feel anything other than like, I'm embarrassed.
00;33;04;20 - 00;33;26;17
Korinne
And so then I quickly quit that. And then I got a job as an aide at an elementary school in Irvine, and I loved it. And it was so crazy because it was just like I didn't I was doing like reading interventions, which doesn't sound fun. And I didn't even know at that point like what that meant. It was like always this little spark where like I had never even been an entrepreneur and even know what I was doing.
00;33;26;22 - 00;33;43;06
Korinne
But it's just such an energy surge of like, I can't have like all this energy and like, they have so many like, needs and they love you and they want to talk to you. And then but then you're also like doing something and then like day to day, like you actually, like can track like what you're doing and how you're helping that.
00;33;43;06 - 00;34;01;19
Korinne
And I think that, that was that like missing piece where I was like, wait until Monday. You didn't know what a long it was. And Friday you do. And like I did that and it's like a weird thing, like day I love this. And so that was kind of like the impetus of just like, whole heartedly, like diving into like becoming a teacher, right?
00;34;01;20 - 00;34;32;19
Steph
And it sounds like you didn't really get over the embarrassment of wanting to change into teaching and switching teaching until you got that feeling, until were actually doing it, but you just had to kind of blindly follow your gut, even though you were embarrassed until you had a new feeling in your body to replace that feeling of embarrassment almost, or to like counterbalance that feeling of harassment, where then you could say, Oh, now I can hang on to this thing that, wow, feels really good and I can put words to it and I can feel it in my body.
00;34;32;19 - 00;34;55;16
Steph
Like now I can compare that to the embarrassment that I was feeling. But you wouldn't have gotten that feeling of like, inspiration and excitement unless you had just acted through the embarrassment anyways. I'm curious, though, what for? How long did you say, Oh, maybe teaching like teaching sounds interesting and people were giving you that feedback of you're too smart for that.
00;34;55;16 - 00;35;00;09
Steph
Like, did you say that when you were younger or did you say that while you were at Oracle or maybe in school?
00;35;00;11 - 00;35;24;06
Korinne
Young So younger. And I don't think like elementary because I think lawyer was pretty like the same thing, but I think it would be like towards like middle school, high school became final. I remember loving I did like junior Spikers volleyball club with this club in Huntington Beach, and I got a job there coaching and I coached like just very young, like one aged kid.
00;35;24;09 - 00;35;40;09
Korinne
And it was this like pleasantly chaotic thing that I just, like, loved. And I did it like several summers, but I didn't really even equate it like it was kind of this like, why I like, I like that. But it was like, that can't be my career. And then it's like, if I, if I ever let that be, I then it was like, Well, no, you're going to do this.
00;35;40;09 - 00;36;00;06
Korinne
Like, oh, well, no, like, you're smart. So like, why would you do that? And so it was almost like, never really, ever fully come. It didn't even come to the service member. Like one of my sister's ex-boyfriends, I think had said a comment or something where it literally verbatim was like, You're too smart to do that one. That was like the one that, like, gutted me where I was like, Yeah, okay.
00;36;00;09 - 00;36;19;00
Korinne
That basically people think like, if you are a teacher, you're not smart. Okay? No, it like that's, that's just the stereotype. And I can't pick a career that has that stereotype, even if it's not true, which is not true in more ways than I can ever express. And it's sad that that is even widely thought enough, enough to be a stereotype.
00;36;19;00 - 00;36;21;06
Korinne
But like I said, it was just that it was rooted.
00;36;21;06 - 00;36;44;01
Steph
Again, I don't think it's even about intellect because I feel like I mean, I could be totally wrong. I just feel like there's so much respect for teachers and it's difficult and anyone who's ever been around a kid knows how challenging it is to teach a kid anything like it. It requires a lot of intellect. I just think that smart is equated with money, and teaching is not equated with a high paying job.
00;36;44;03 - 00;36;59;23
Korinne
That's crazy because, I mean, there's it's a super pivot of just like paying teachers and like their expertise and all of these things. But the grass is like it's like that very phrase, like the grass is greener. Like obviously there's aspects about it that still bug me, but like I know I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing.
00;36;59;27 - 00;37;25;12
Korinne
And so I think that like along the way, no matter what you end up doing or what, no matter what, like feels right to you, it's not getting rid of those stereotypes or those things. It's just understanding that like they exist, but it like it cannot impact you doing what you know, you need to do. And anyone that thinks that is probably not someone that like I would care to be around, right?
00;37;25;13 - 00;37;43;01
Korinne
If you have that opinion of teaching, then I don't really. There's not a lot I could connect with you on because like, I'm not interested in having that dialog with with you. So there's a lot of jobs that pay a lot of money, but arguably are not as important and not like you don't have to be as smart to do that, right?
00;37;43;03 - 00;37;48;09
Korinne
So like, you can't you can't equate what someone gets paid to like their aptitude.
00;37;48;12 - 00;37;58;22
Steph
Totally. I can tell that you're incredibly passionate about what you do and you're obviously in the right place doing the right thing. So how does it feel to be in that result?
00;37;58;28 - 00;38;18;29
Korinne
Many things that like make me just like happy to be at work. But I think something that I struggle with currently is like I've always been the path of like, Well, what do I want to do? And it's like now that there's nothing that I'm working towards, I think someone that like someone that has always been on this hamster wheel of like success and this and that.
00;38;18;29 - 00;38;39;04
Korinne
Like sometimes I'm like, what? I want to be like an app or toaster, this or that. And I'm like, Do I want to be that? Because I love, I love what I do. And so I think right now I'm actually currently, like analyzing like, do I want to ever like, look at like what else? There is an education within the school setting that's like maybe like higher up because I'm passionate about that.
00;38;39;04 - 00;38;56;19
Korinne
And like, that would be more something that I would do, like at the 20 year mark or something like that. Or do I do I think that because even still I'm resorting back to like old stereotypes of like, Oh, well, I'm here and I've done this and I feel so great. But like, it's almost like, can I just like post like, is that in existence?
00;38;56;23 - 00;39;06;16
Korinne
Like you're allowed to have or you're just happy and you are doing what you want to do, but you're not working towards anything like you feel. It's a really unknown feeling.
00;39;06;22 - 00;39;29;02
Steph
I love that though. That is a scary feeling, I'm sure. And as a society, I think that most people are pushing each other, pushing themselves to ask like, Well, what's not? What's next? What's next? But we're allowed to just enjoy what we're doing and enjoy the stage that we're at. And that might change in the future and it might not.
00;39;29;02 - 00;39;35;14
Steph
And it's okay to just feel peace, like it's okay to be still. But I think we're so afraid of stillness.
00;39;35;16 - 00;39;52;27
Korinne
It is cool and teaching, though I think in a lot of jobs there might be this nature of like maybe you feel like stale, but I think I've never felt that way with teaching because you can keep your same job, but you can like do something different within that job if that makes sense. Like I moved from first to fourth grade every year.
00;39;52;27 - 00;39;56;22
Korinne
You have to kind of like figure out the ecosystem of your classroom and how it works.
00;39;56;22 - 00;40;38;03
Steph
Yeah, yeah. And something that you talked about really briefly when we first met was still kind of comparing yourself at times, what like what boxes did they check that you used to ascribe to it? Maybe you weren't any more and, and kind of think about different directions that you have taken or could take, etc., etc.. And so something that we really briefly talked about was those labels and how yeah, sure is like kind of grew into their own identities and, and comparing yourself to the different parts that they took also just like to remind everyone that it's, it's normal to have those thoughts and it's totally mean that you're on the wrong path.
00;40;38;03 - 00;40;40;13
Steph
So I'd love to hear you shared with me about that.
00;40;40;13 - 00;40;59;03
Korinne
So it's crazy because like everyone in my family is like, that's what I'm like credit to I think there's like two layers to that because both my sisters are married and they both have very successful husbands. So like my little sister is married to a lawyer and then my older sister is married to a man that does data analytics for DoorDash.
00;40;59;03 - 00;41;26;12
Korinne
And so it's like very well-paying jobs. So already, like with just like they're they're doing really well and then they're also successful in their own right. So there's just moments where it's like and like, they never make me feel that way. It's completely self imposed, but like, you know, and it's like looking at like my sister's wedding was just glamorous and gorgeous and beautiful and like, both of their weddings and like, sometimes, like the things that they can buy and do and like those types of experiences.
00;41;26;12 - 00;41;44;21
Korinne
Like, of course, like there's no way that you could be like, oh, like, like, that's okay. Like, I didn't want to have that cute, you know, purse anyway. But like, I think I try to, like, remind myself and just rationalize like they're, they're happy and I'm happy for them, but like, I wasn't happy when I did something like that.
00;41;44;21 - 00;42;04;27
Korinne
So, like, you know, again, it's like that's kind of that balance of like you too could go back and leverage the things that you've done and go get a job like they're doing. And you could have that money, but you didn't like that and you were miserable. And so what's going to get you up in the morning? Like, do you want to leave a tan bag or do you want to leave your job like.
00;42;04;27 - 00;42;24;13
Korinne
Yeah, and it and it's great. Like some people have both and that's great. But like, that just wasn't what it was like. You can't you can't will yourself to be happy. And I think like that was my biggest takeaway. I was like I had to figure out like, what's going to make me the most content and what was going to make me feel the best.
00;42;24;13 - 00;42;43;26
Korinne
And like I love what I'm doing every day. If I go home and I look on Instagram and someone's in Fiji and they're in like a luxury villa, yeah, like, that's cool. Like, sign me up maybe one day, but like, it doesn't, it doesn't make what I did any less cool or successful or fulfilling because, like, those things are just like they come and go.
00;42;44;00 - 00;43;11;05
Korinne
But like you said, I'm not going to spend 30 years of my life doing something that I hate so that I could have things that like maybe might make me happy, but like, maybe not also temporarily. Yeah, yeah. But I also really do because like, I have coworkers who also like everyone's financials situation is different. So like, I have coworkers who are both teachers and, well, for a number of reasons, whether it's like generational wealth, family or like spouses.
00;43;11;05 - 00;43;35;14
Korinne
And so, like it's even in my own space where sometimes it's like cool. Like they get to do what they like to do and they get to do those things like, you know what I mean? But that's just like, like you can't I think you just make yourself crazy if you sit and and compare and think about what you don't have and not think about all the things that that you do, because I, I will tell myself my mom is the sole reason why I try to make myself feel this way.
00;43;35;14 - 00;43;53;05
Korinne
But it's like, like a lot of the messaging that she gave me, like throughout the years and so is just like someone would killed all the life that you have like and you have to remember that you as miserable as you are unhappy as you are like there is someone out there that would fail to have what you have and do what you do.
00;43;53;05 - 00;43;58;29
Korinne
And you cannot take that for granted because they would trade with you in a heartbeat and you'd probably be not okay.
00;43;58;29 - 00;44;18;11
Steph
So yeah, you know, yeah, I love that perspective. And I also love that you remind yourself that it's a choice that you made to value happiness and fulfillment and that inspiration that you feel in your work over the money that you could make at another job, a job that you had, that you've experienced already and you could go back to any day.
00;44;18;17 - 00;44;47;02
Steph
But you're making that choice every day. And it's just I think it's it changes everything. When you take ownership for your decisions and you take that personal responsibility and accountability for your life into consideration. As a teacher, obviously you're talking to kids about their futures and education and and like me, teaching them maybe how to set goals for themselves, whether it be like in the classroom throughout the year in their lives.
00;44;47;05 - 00;44;52;20
Steph
How do you talk to them about higher education and then career?
00;44;52;26 - 00;45;19;11
Korinne
Yeah, I think I kind of let them lead a lot of the conversations and just not putting any sort of emphasis on like, Oh, that's a great job or like, that's a cool job. But it's, it's really crazy to see because they already naturally do it. And it's like having gone through this experience, it is crazy to see because I we did in fourth grade, I haven't done it this year, but we do something called like an informative job paper and we're the only requirement is we say research a job that you think you'd be interested in and right, like just write about it.
00;45;19;11 - 00;45;42;07
Korinne
Like learn about it and tell us like, what are the steps to get there? And we don't even say, like, what? What's the salary? So many of them put a lot of emphasis on salary, a lot of them lawyers, doctors like. And it's weird. It's this weird poster girl thing where I think a lot of parents just like unknowingly talk about success in a way where it's like, you need to get a job and you go to college.
00;45;42;07 - 00;45;58;29
Korinne
You do that to get money. And I mean, half my class were boys and they all want to be NBA players and that like but again, it's like that is a you know, a very sought after career where you make a lot of money and a lot of the conversations with like, oh, bro, like his, you know, his contract was like 89 million.
00;45;58;29 - 00;46;15;04
Korinne
And I'm just like and not really No. One that I can think of fixed. So something that was like, like that I would deal with stereotypical like low paying jobs. And I do think that, that and I, I didn't think it was like I'm not I'm not out here to try to, like, crush your dreams if you want to be a lawyer.
00;46;15;04 - 00;46;30;11
Korinne
I'm not out here being like, you should be a teacher. But I do think a lot of the conversations that I had when I was helping them write it, I said, Think about like what? Like how that would make you feel. Like if, you know, if you're going to work or you're doing these things like, how are you impacting people?
00;46;30;11 - 00;46;50;21
Korinne
How are you helping people? And there were kids that kind of like struggled like one kid literally, just like I want to be a CEO. And I was like, What does that mean to you? Like what is a CEO? And like, they really didn't have any other thoughts about it other than I'm sure at one point your parents told, like, you know, like you need to be a CEO of a company, but like, they didn't even know what that meant.
00;46;50;21 - 00;47;09;23
Korinne
We really do make kids think that, like, the only definition of success is money. Like from a really early age. Because they came to me that way. And I, I tried, you know, to just like foster dialog and conversation. But I also think, like, I'm I'm pretty firm in like the way that I run my class is like, I'm not there to tell them how to think or what to think.
00;47;09;23 - 00;47;32;01
Korinne
I'm just here to kind of like lead them. And my kids are so powerful in the way that like they are just like accessing like their way through life, balancing like what all these adults in their life are saying, what the messaging that they get on the Internet and all of these things like it's wild when you are alone in a room with nine year olds that are comfortable sharing things with you.
00;47;32;01 - 00;47;42;04
Korinne
Like what? Like their perception of life is and how sometimes you just want to take them and be like, you know, when you're 30, you like you get better, I promise, you know?
00;47;42;06 - 00;48;08;29
Steph
But they're so lucky to have you, because I think a lot of people are never asked those questions that you just said. You repeat to them, do that exercise and you never know how it's going to impact them. They might you know, completely write it off and just finish the assignment and move on with their lives. But like, that might be internalized in some way and it might pop back up into their subconscious down the line or it might have a direct impact on them right in that moment.
00;48;08;29 - 00;48;29;02
Steph
So I think it's really important that you're having somewhat of a conversation and even prompting them to do that exercise and then just offering questions like, like you said, not telling them what to do, what's right, what's wrong, but just asking any questions so that they can explore it themselves. I think that's really, really interesting. I have one final question for you.
00;48;29;10 - 00;49;01;27
Steph
If you were bouncing back to or talking to the version of yourself that left hand state was at home going to USC and just one track mind didn't want to mess up again, You know what you considered it messing up at the time and you were going on that PR path and then took the job at Oracle. If you were talking to someone who's in that same position or kind of like on that same track, what's something that you might share with them having now experienced what you've experienced?
00;49;01;29 - 00;49;02;21
Steph
I think just.
00;49;02;21 - 00;49;28;08
Korinne
Like not letting not like sitting in the misery and talking to people that you like value their opinion or even just people that like, make you feel good and just like doing it and going for it. I think you can get so bogged down by the what ifs to the point that it's paralyzing. And I know I did that to myself and it it took my mom being supportive of it.
00;49;28;08 - 00;49;55;13
Korinne
And like people that I talk to, like friends kind of being like, Oh, that's different. But like, yeah, like you'll, you'll be good at it. And like, I just kind of like, took the leap and who's to say, I mean, like, that might not be the best advice to someone, might be discouraging. But I think just really like not allowing yourself to think about the, the what ifs because, like, it's still to this day, I could sit and think about, well, oh, if I stayed at Oracle like maybe I'd own a home right now, or you know what I mean?
00;49;55;13 - 00;50;14;28
Korinne
Like you, you will forever go crazy if you second guess things. And I think, like, I just always like you. I think you when you feel that you feel like that, that go into that eating position and just being like, I like this like listen to that. Because like, you could try it and you could not like it.
00;50;14;28 - 00;50;33;08
Korinne
And I think just like there's no shame in trying. I think that that would be the biggest takeaway. There's no shame in trying something and rerouting and failing and whether that's one time going to Penn State or two times, you know, choosing the wrong job. Like you just have to keep trying because, like, it's so sad to be miserable, like.
00;50;33;08 - 00;50;34;08
Steph
Life is too.
00;50;34;11 - 00;50;49;20
Korinne
Short to be unhappy. And I think you hear a lot of these stories of like, I did this career change at like 60 or like some of that goes back to, like warm hearted like, Oh, that's cute. But you always think it like, can't be you because like, you've done something for, for too long, you know, that was my mindset.
00;50;49;20 - 00;51;03;01
Korinne
Like, well, I was like, I went to college for this and it's like, how could I? Like, I've already been at this for for four years now. Like, I can't I can't do something else. Like, because something else is just not in the cards, you know, like, you just, you have to allow yourself.
00;51;03;01 - 00;51;05;09
Steph
To think it's like, possible because.
00;51;05;12 - 00;51;05;24
Korinne
It.
00;51;05;25 - 00;51;10;08
Steph
Is, you know, totally, totally. And the what ifs are always fear.
00;51;10;11 - 00;51;26;29
Korinne
And they're never not they're like they literally right at every step of the way. And I think that like that's because I think someone that might like change of career path and then like they're in it and they like aspects of it, but they might see something that kind of pulls them back in that feeling of like, Oh my gosh, like, what if I didn't do this?
00;51;26;29 - 00;51;34;22
Korinne
Like, I haven't? And then still, like, I'm human, Like, might cause one of my friends that I started with Oracle, I was just at her wedding and like, she can't, like, transition from Oracle.
00;51;34;22 - 00;51;35;19
Steph
She makes.
00;51;35;22 - 00;51;51;14
Korinne
She kills. It is like a manager, like, still stayed in the tech space and, like, owns a home in Redondo and is just like a total boss. But it's just one of those things my millennial showing my boss favorite stuff, but like, you know what I mean? And so it's like sometimes I'm like, You know what? Like what I like what I be what I be there.
00;51;51;14 - 00;52;03;21
Korinne
But then I'm like, No, because you she loved you, right? You know, And like, she is happy because she followed the path that she was meant be on. But like, you wouldn't be her because you don't. You didn't like.
00;52;03;21 - 00;52;23;27
Steph
That. Yeah, totally. And you can't fake passion. You can't fake inspiration Like it shows and people can see it whether you think you're doing a good job acting or not. Really? Yeah, I love it. Well, thank you so, so much for your time. Thank you for teaching. Are youth. I want you to be my niece's teacher and my nephew are over.
00;52;23;28 - 00;52;42;00
Steph
Oh, my gosh. We should all move to California. Hey, me again. It would mean the world to me if you could click, follow or subscribe wherever you are watching or listening to this conversation that just shows me that you like what I'm putting out and it's good karma. So just click that one little button and it really, truly means the world to me.
00;52;42;01 - 00;52;52;06
Steph
Okay, Thanks. Have a great day.